


Safe Now

by flightinflame



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: Badass Farah Black, Dirk Gently Whump, Everyone Needs A Hug, F/F, M/M, Nightmares, Rescue, Team as Family
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-31
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-10-01 08:15:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,901
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17240687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flightinflame/pseuds/flightinflame
Summary: Farah, Tina, Todd and the Rowdies rescue Amanda, Vogel, and Dirk.





	Safe Now

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ToMarsAndBeyond3](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToMarsAndBeyond3/gifts).



> Prompt: Martin being a dad, the Rowdies being soft when they're all alone, taking care of Amanda or Vogel. Todd taking care of Dirk during one of his nightmares or flashbacks. Tina convincing Farah to chill out.  
> Thanks to Lourdesdeath for betaing!

Todd didn't want to allow his eyes to close as he continued running his fingers through Dirk's hair, hating how short it was now. He was worried that if he looked away, even for a moment, he might find that Dirk was gone. That their rescue was a dream, and that he was still alone while his sister, his friend, and one of the Rowdies were all trapped within that hell.

Dirk jumped slightly in his grasp as they drove over a bump in the road, and Todd shushed him as he whimpered, rocking him a little. He didn't want to think about the way his heart had ached when they were apart, how he was hypnotised now by the slight part in Dirk's lips as he breathed slowly. His feelings for Dirk were certain, now. But he wasn't quite enough of an asshole to inflict those thoughts on Dirk when he was still healing, when he had been through so much the past three weeks or so.

The van continued to race along the roads, and if it had been anyone other than Farah behind the wheel he might have worried, but he knew that she would get them where they were going, that she had taken all the evasive driving and whatever other training existed. If she wanted to get them somewhere in one piece, she could manage it.

Dirk's eyes flickered slightly, and Todd couldn't help a sudden burst of gratitude that those eyes were still the same vivid blue that had played a starring role in his attacks since Dirk's disappearance. Dirk looked pale, his hair cropped short, his body bruised. But his eyes were still the same, and Todd held onto that. No matter what else had happened, Dirk was still himself. It might take a little while for him to get back to his normal confident bounciness, Todd understood that, and would wait for him. The important thing was that Dirk was with them, that Dirk was safe and they were in a good position to start rescuing him. That helped a lot.

Todd paused for a moment in his touching, and Dirk whimpered a little, so he carried on, shushing him tenderly. Dirk fell quiet, nuzzling into the touch, and Todd couldn't say with any certainty if Dirk was awake or asleep. But Dirk needed this, even more than Todd did. He'd been without him for so long, and now this would help him. He could use that, help him. If this touch was needed, he could do that, stroking his fingers through Dirk's hair slowly, in time with his breathing. They'd got them back, and now they had to find ways of keeping them safe. He'd pat Dirk until they reached Montana if that would help. He let his own eyes close, leaning back against the seats in front of him, his hands still absent-mindedly petting Dirk's hair.

He could hear whispering from the front seats.

***

"Farah," Tina murmured, reaching over and resting her hand on Farah's shoulder. "You're okay."

"I just-"  
"We got them back, man. You were awesome. I mean, you're _always_ awesome, but you were like, super duper awesome. You saved them all."  
"You could have got hurt Tina. And you saw the state they're in. Amanda's sedated, I don't know if she's going to... what if she isn't okay?"

"We have to believe in her. Girl's a fighter," Tina answered, and then shuffled so she could look between the seats and yell out into the back. "Guys, how is Amanda?"  
"Heart rate of seventy, breaths per minute of eighteen," one of the Rowdies supplied. Tina frowned, trying to remember her training then giving up.  
"How's that Farah?"  
"That's within normal ranges," Farah supplied, her grip tight on the steering wheel. "For an adult of her age... that's around where we'd expect."

"Cool, Farah says she's doing awesome, you guys just keep her breathing and tell her she's doing great?"  
"You got it," one of the Rowdies answered.   
Tina reached out and gently squeezed Farah's hand.  
"See, she's going to make it. We got them out."  
"They look like shit."  
"Yeah, well there's a bathroom in the station they can use," Tina answered. "The important thing is they are no longer shit that is trapped within a literal prison cell, so this is an improvement."

Farah considered for a moment, as though she was trying to work out how to respond. When she laughed, it was an almost harsh noise, a surprised sound. But then she smiled at Tina.  
"I guess so."  
"That's because of you Farah. You were awesome."

Farah smiled a little, taking one hand off the steering wheel for a moment to interlace her fingers with Tina's, squeezing. Tina squeezed back.  
"We got them. We're getting them back to the station, and we're doing what we can to fix them, but they're safe now. We did it. We saved them, you saved them, because Lydia is right: you are a total badass."

Farah's smile was fragile, emerging for the first time in painfully long. But Tina smiled back, because that smile was real.  
"Just got to get back to Bergsberg, and then Hobbs can help look after them, and you and me can have a nice relaxing bath, how does that sound?"  
"Pretty good," Farah answered with a fond smile. Tina nodded, squeezing her hand again and twisting to look out at the countryside as the world outside raced past their window and Farah hurried along the roads.

Every so often, Tina glanced into the rear view mirrors, but there was no sign of anyone following them.

***

Dirk whimpered.  
 _He twisted away from the scientist, trying to shake his head, to explain that he couldn't do what they wanted, that his mind and his abilities didn't work the way they should. But the scientist didn't care about that. Dirk struggled against the restraints which bound him, not bothering to try and hold back screams or sobs. Crying never changed anything._

 _The scientist was holding a scalpel, and Dirk tried to pull away but the restraints meant that there was nowhere to go.  
"Come here now, Svlad. We need to work out how you work."   
Dirk screamed as the man loomed closer, reaching out and gripping his arm, tightening his hold, shaking-_  
"Dirk!" Todd's voice cut through the nightmare, and Dirk opened his eyes, panting in sheer terror. He couldn't understand. Todd shouldn't be here. Todd should be safe. What was happening to him was terrible but it would be worse, so much worse, if Todd got hurt. Todd was his world.

Dirk deserved to get hurt, but Todd didn't. The thought of Todd in Blackwing - and he realised, then, that Todd wasn't wearing a jumpsuit. He knew Todd wasn't staff. Todd would never do that to him. None of it made sense. He looked up at him, then tried to move away, to protect him. Todd's arms wrapped around him, pulling him close, and he tried to wriggle free.  
"You can't be here Todd they'll hurt you they'll hurt-"

The world around him turned blue. It was a colour he associated with pain, and yet this time the emotion that swept through him was relief. The terror was still there, a solid lump in his throat that felt like it was choking him, but it was a little easier to gasp in air around it. He sniffled slightly, the fear that was in him fading a little as he breathed. 

Todd's arms were around him, and he collapsed against him, starting to sob. Todd was there, shushing him, solid and real.  
"They... they cut my hair..." he whispered. They'd done it so it was easier to monitor brain waves. They'd said it was for Dirk's own good but he hated it. He cared about his appearance but it had been taken away from him now.

Todd's fingers stroked through his hair again.  
"It'll get better. And you look cute like this."  
Dirk sniffled, nuzzling up into Todd's hands.  
"You're a liar. But thank you."

Todd pressed a kiss to his forehead, and Dirk found that he started crying again, but he just stayed in Todd's lap. Todd wasn't shoving him away, and he had nowhere else to be. He was free, and Todd was solid and real against him. He was too exhausted to care about anything else.

***

The car continued to bounce along roads Todd didn't know. Dirk had fallen asleep in his lap, occasionally waking to sniffle slightly. Rather than disturb him, Todd just kept patting his hair, murmuring gently. The Rowdies were curled up at the very back of the van, quietly taking care of their own, and he didn't look too hard. He was just glad they'd calmed Dirk when he'd began to panic - even if Todd wished he could do it himself, he knew he couldn't. Not the way that they did.

"Nearly there," Farah called from the driving seat, and Todd began to carefully wake Dirk - keeping his movements gentle and his voice quiet but reassuring.  
"Dirk? Dirk, we're in Bergsberg. We're here."  
He had a lot of practice talking Amanda down from attacks. It seemed the same technique worked here.

Dirk opened his eyes gradually, but seemed not to be panicking. He actually smiled when his gaze locked onto Todd.  
"Thank you."

"It's okay," Todd replied. "We were always going to find you, Dirk. I'm sorry it took so long."  
"It's okay," Dirk answered. "You came to find me, that's all that... that's all that matters." He nuzzled into Todd's shoulder, as though he could no longer face the effort of holding his head up high. Todd shushed him gently, trying to soothe him as the van made its way up to Bergsberg. 

Todd tried not to think about the fact he was in love with Dirk. Right now, Dirk was hurting, and he needed a friend, not someone who was attempting to get closer than was acceptable. Dirk deserved more than that, and he was sure he could give it.

The van parked, and Farah got out first, checking the area. Todd wasn't worried - he knew that this was a safe place, but he also knew that for her own sanity, Farah needed to check. He couldn't begrudge her that. He heard talking, and then the van doors opened and Hobbs was there.  
"Hey, Todd, Dirk, it's good to see you, especially you Dirk, you'd been giving us quite a fright. Now, let's get you inside and warmed up. There's hot cocoa on the stove. Tina can bring some for the guys in the van it out here if you don't want to come in-"  
"We don't leave the van," one of the Rowdies, the leader, snarled the words. Todd would have backed away, but Hobbs just nodded calmly.  
"Righto. Well, I need to get these boys inside and warm, and we'll bring you your drinks soon, how's that sound?"

The leader nodded, and Todd carefully helped Dirk manoeuvre his way out of the van. Dirk ended up clinging to Hobbs when he saw him. Todd watched the two of them, making his own way into the station and helping Tina prepare the drinks.

Dirk was sitting on the sofa, but he held out his arms when he saw Todd, so with a roll of his eyes Todd joined him, handing him his drink.  
"Here you go."  
"I missed you," Dirk whispered, half to himself. "I thought... I was scared they'd hurt you, because of me."

"It's okay Dirk-"  
"But what if who I am, what I am, gets you hurt or killed-"  
"Dirk, I'm glad you're in my life. And you're safe now. Let's get you healthy before we worry about that."  
Dirk nodded slowly, taking a sip of his hot chocolate, then reaching up to touch Todd's face.  
"Still can't believe you're real."  
"I'm real," Todd promised. "I'm real, and you're safe now."

Dirk leaned in, closing the gap between them and cautiously brushing his lips against Todd's own, before pulling back nervously.  
"I missed you Todd. I know... I hope... I just..." The words all seemed to fail him, so Todd leaned in, kissing Dirk just as tenderly as Dirk had kissed him.  
"Me too."

***

Martin felt sick, and angry, as the van sped away from Blackwing, with Farah at the wheel. They'd smashed the place up, left it a smoking crater, and he still felt like he would never escape it. But he'd failed. He knew that. 

He had always promised Vogel he wasn't ever going to get taken back to that place. He'd managed it when they'd been attacked, sending him and Drummer off to live on the run and end up in some weird fucked up fantasy world. But now he'd failed.

Blackwing had had him for three weeks. That was three weeks where he hadn't been with them, where he would have been alone in a cell reliving his worst nightmares, without the older Rowdies there to hold him. 

Martin pushed that down. He couldn't let his own feelings matter now, not when Vogel needed them, when Vogel needed to be held and made to feel safe. He had scars and scrapes across much of his body. Martin knew that given time a lot of them would heal and the bruising would fade, but it didn't make it any easier to look at as they rattled along the roads. Vogel was quiet, his arms held up against his chest.

_Martin kicked down the door to one of the cells, his instincts telling him this was the place to go, this was where they were. He'd nearly gagged at what he had seen. Drummer was laying on a medical gurney, her skin pale, tubes running in and out of her. A few feet away, Vogel was on the floor, restraints holding his arms and a mask over his face._

_He'd fallen to his knees beside Vogel.  
"Hey, look at me baby bird. You're safe now. We're here."   
Vogel had lifted his head, but it didn't feel like he'd understood who Martin was. He just whimpered softly, cringing away from the contact._

That whimper was the only noise Vogel had made since his rescue. Now, he was curled up silently against Martin's chest, shaking a little, as Martin stroked his hair.  
"You're doing so well baby bird," Martin murmured. Vogel gave no sign of hearing, but Martin had to assume he could hear it, that his words were helping.

The van drove on, and they were quiet, aside from his whispered reassurances, and Gripps listing off Drummer's stats. He couldn't be sure, but he assumed they'd kept her sedated for a while. He glanced over at the notes, and shuffled Vogel in his arms slightly so that he could start to read through them. It looked like she'd been triggered into having multiple attacks, and then when they couldn't calm her down they'd sedated her heavily.

He was furious. Vogel had been right there, and could have helped, but they hadn't let him. They'd hurt both of them. But him being angry wouldn't help Vogel. He just held him, making soft shushing noises in the hope that it might help take a little of the fear away.

It was a relief when the van stopped, even if he didn't like the fact the man that approached was wearing uniform. He mentioned going inside, and Martin snarled.  
"We don't leave the van."

"Righto," the man in uniform answered, seeming to be entirely unbothered by Martin's tone. Martin wasn't used to that, but stayed quiet, curious as to what would happen now. "Well, I need to get these boys inside and warm, and we'll bring you your drinks soon, how's that sound?"

Martin nodded firmly. That would be better, to have some quiet so that they could look after each other. It was hard, letting anyone see when they were hurting. They were all too aware of time in Blackwing, where any kind of vulnerability could be used against them, where showing concern was asking for someone to get hurt worse.

He knew he wasn't there any more. They'd done what they could to destroy it, but still it lingered over them, digging its fingers into them, tearing them open and prodding at what was exposed.

Vogel nuzzled him, still subdued and silent, and Martin ran a gentle hand along his spine.  
"You're safe baby bird. We're here. You aren't alone any more, you don't need to be afraid."

Vogel gave no sign of having heard, but he was still in his arms, so Martin had to hope. He'd seen Vogel get like this before, but only when he was younger, if he'd been in isolation for a few weeks. It had always messed with him, and it seemed like now was no different.   
"We're here," Martin promised. Vogel seemed to fall asleep in his grasp. In a strange way that was a positive sign - it meant that he felt safe enough to relax. He just held him, and when the van door opened it was Cross that grabbed the drinks they were offered. Gripps was still monitoring Drummer.

The van door closed again, and the drinks were handed around. He took his and gulped it down, not allowing himself time to savour the marshmallows and whipped cream on the top. He tried holding it out to Vogel, but he didn't move to take it.

"Okay..." Martin gently brought the drink to Vogel's mouth, carefully bumping the cup against his bottom lip. It seemed to take a couple of seconds for him to understand, but then he opened his mouth, taking a sip of the liquid. Any other time, Martin would have laughed at the cream that was on the tip of Vogel's nose, but for now he was happy to just carefully wipe it away, making encouraging noises as Vogel took another sip when it was offered.

He could hear Gripps singing softly, his voice a gentle rumble. He didn't sing much, but he had when Vogel was little, and maybe it was reassuring to him to hear it now. Cross handed over a blanket.  
"Gotta keep you warm baby bird."   
Martin tucked it around him, rocking him softly and trying to hum along, in the hope it might help Vogel come back to them.

There was a knock on the door, and Cross opened it to find the shapeshifter there, her arms crossed across her chest.  
"What?"  
"I thought Vogel might be hungry?" she explained, her voice a strange sing-song. "You said I couldn't help with the rescue in case I got caught, but if he's hungry I can be scared for him. Dirk's not well enough."

"That's kind of you," Martin answered. "But we're gonna see how it goes first."  
"No point hurting you if we don't gotta."  
"Yeah, we like you," Gripps agreed, reaching out to pat her arm. She smiled at him brightly, then skipped away.  
"Brave kid," Martin muttered, nuzzling Vogel. "See, people care about you baby bird. They want you to be okay." 

There was another knock, and the door was opened to reveal Beast stood there. She clambered in, and climbed straight through to sit on the passenger seat, pausing only to pat Vogel.  
"Good. Home now."  
"Yeah, he is," Martin agreed, rocking Vogel gently.

"Drummer's breathing's got faster," Gripps reported, listing off the percentage increase. Her eyes flickered slightly, and then opened, staring up at them.  
"Guys?"  
"We got you safe. Vogel's here, Brit's safe too," Cross supplied.  
"You're home," Gripps agreed, his hand resting on her wrist to take her pulse.

"Vogel?"  
Vogel didn't respond to his name, so Martin helped shuffle him closer.  
"He's not doing so well," Martin explained, able to take a closer look at Amanda now. She looked tired, and her skin was clammy to the touch.   
"They not take care of you Drummer?"  
"Their hospitality fucking sucked. Can I downvote them on TripAdvisor?" she mumbled, then yawned. "God I'm tired."

"That's okay. We can rest now."   
Cross and Gripps propped Amanda next to Vogel and Martin, pulling out jackets and blankets and whatever else they could find until a pile was on the floor of the van. They didn't always nest like this, but sometimes they needed it - and today was one of those days. 

Martin placed Vogel down, and helped Amanda down next to him. She held him close, and Martin saw a few wisps of blue smoke drift between them. He hoped that was a good sign - that Vogel was eating and Amanda was losing some of her pain. Cross sat by the door to the van.  
"I gotta guard it boss."  
"Thanks," Martin laid close to Vogel, sheltering him. Gripps did the same to Amanda, and Martin knew he'd be tracking her breathing and pulse through the night, that he would wake them if anything went wrong. They were in their van, the six members of the Rowdy Three. They were safer here than anywhere else.

***

Vogel laid in the middle of the nest that had been made. There was a lantern, a little night light he'd had when they first escaped, that someone had put in his view. He opened his eyes. Drummer was there, and the guys were with him. He wasn't alone. He wasn't there any more. If he'd had the strength to say something, to make a noise, he would have, but it felt impossible. There was too much, and he felt like if a noise escaped he'd never be able to stop screaming. 

He was with the guys. He tried to repeat that, over and over in his head, but he was so tired that he closed his eyes once more, and sleep soon overwhelmed him.

His dreams didn't remember that the guys had rescued him. His dreams were full of memories of the past few weeks, and of before. He didn't want to go back. He'd been told he wasn't going back but he had been and they'd hurt him, and he was scared they'd come again. Drummer had been doing so badly when she was there. He didn't want her to die.

He sobbed softly, the sound echoing around the silent bus, and it grew louder as he continued crying, weeping helplessly, unable to call his tears back. Warm arms wrapped around him, and he could hear Martin shushing him, rubbing at his shoulders.  
"That's it baby bird. You let it out, you're safe now."   
He knew he was safe. He was in the van, and Drummer was there, and he had the guys, and he was happy but the tears wouldn't stop now they started, big messy sobs that he couldn't control.

He shivered and Gripps reached over, patting his hair, and then Cross was rubbing at his calf, the only bit he could reach from where he was sitting. Beast twisted around, reaching out to stroke his shoulder.  
"Goodboy safe now," she told him. Martin was there, and Amanda reached out, threading her fingers through his own. He was safe. He wasn't alone. Not again.

"Thanks guys," he mumbled, and he could feel his family around him. Exhaustion overtook him, and he fell asleep listening to the quiet murmurs of the guys and the soft sound of Drummer's breath.


End file.
